3 days ago I bite my own tongue while I was eating my sandwich.

It still hurts.

It's always those who train hard that people give a shit.

But when they are successful.

Everyone want to know about it and ask for a piece of that cake.

So, no. If I ever win big in my life.

Nobody is going to get their own piece of the cake.

Because you got to train for yourself.

Get strong, get better and don't give a fuck.

Alot of people love to ruin those who work hard by the way.

Because scumbags are worthless and that's how they

get something out of great people.

I expect nothing from anyone, but I am ready to see

bitches and losers that will try to bring me down

at anytime of the day.

With any dirt they can find, because they are afraid to work

for themselves and love to be lazy.

Good people do stupid things & bad people bring it up to look good.

So if no one read this and that nobody cares of my hard struggles.

I won't bother when anyone say shit about me.

I am a man who live in the now, who know who he is

and don't care about any crappy opinion.

For those who work hard, keep up the good work!

You got this!

I think everyone can agree. Instagram is fake.

When I started to post my pictures and

saw that most profile who add me are just recent

and new accounts.. Well, I just gave up

on caring about it.

Also the women in there post anything that is a little

too sexy. Just saying, not that I bother about that

or anything.

It's just, does dignity and integrity matter anymore?

I mean I draw NSFW in this account and shit.

But being able to expose yourself for likes

and views.. That's nothing fictional.

And yeah, I rather prefer to make stuff that is fictional

then showing every bits of my body to strangers.

I dunno, its retarded.

At least I consider it that way.

Plus none of these woman deserve a boyfriend or even an husband.

I won't have second though on that.

If some have any boyfriend.. They must cuck them up.

I will never date a woman who have an instagram.

If that is even possible in these days.

That says alot about me.

I rather have a woman who respect her privacy over all.

And that she hate any attentions from strangers.

Hope to find a woman that is still like that in today era.

I can sprint now!

Wasn't able 3 weeks ago.

Now the thing I did is that

I made jumping jacks first

to shock my heart and to

train it to be able to endure the pacing.

I feel goooood!

I am actually wondering about if I could even do a rated E work.

Like, a game or arts. Even music.

I mean I certainly did before. But now I am kinda interested to do one

thing that is correctly made for Everyone.

It's going to be methodical and my goal is to be able to impress

everyone. If that ever happen of course.

Maybe doing a game that is average at least. Like 2 or 3 stars.

I don't expect much of it, might take me few days in the close future.

I have many unfinished projects.. But maybe doing something easy

might be better?

I dunno, I will take 2 days to brainstorm this and then I will show something.

Enough talk, lets do it.

Since a while, I had expectations on myself.

Like getting abs. Getting rich.

Becoming somewhat known.

But right now, I give zero fucks about most of it.

I want to be disciplined and creative with a constructive

outlook on my work.

I want to be full on artistic creativity.

Like, music, arts, animation and video games.

But that stuff takes awhile. And I need cash to pay bills,

time is hard but I can substain myself.

I try my best to do everything. Like in every way possible.

What I know, is that every time I do shit that is difficult

in any artistic medium. I learn alot and improve.

That's my main goal now.

I really have no expectation on being the best or worst.

What I care is to do everything to understand the basics

and the fondamentals of art. As a whole.

That's pretty much my philosophy here.

I'm more of a realist right now.

With many projects undone or unfinished.

But still I got something to show.. At least.

I want to be able to accomplish alot actually.

Anyway, that's all for today.

Right now I did a workout that keep going for 7 days. Changed my diet and I wake up at 4h30 AM.

Nobody is awake at that hour and I can train without any risk of people complaining.

I even start thinking about doing boxing again.

But more on that later.

In my life, there is almost none who cares about how I feel, how I think or what do I go through.

But when I go to see my family members and kids come around to ask me if I need a hug.

It hits me.

I feel like being an adult is so darn difficult.

When I babysitted my nephew with his friends and wanted me to play on the trempoline or to run in the backyard.

I dunno man.

I felt happy and just forgot everything.

This is why I want to be a father one day.

I keep the drawing the kids gift me.

I even got a bracelet that I wear now.

We draw stuff on paper on the dinner table and I even bake a cake that they all loved.

This moment, it was a privilege to me.

Priceless and I will never forget how much those kids help me to re-find my happiness.

If you are a man.

Who love yourself.

And enjoy doing your

best.

Like and comment this post.

You know, in these days.

It is hard for me to find a woman that

I want to engage with.

Most just want temporary stuffs.

Other just think about money

or just to have fun.

I desire a woman who prefer long

term goals. Not just a long term relationship. But that she want to share

her life with me. That she want to have

only one man in her life.

That she can tell me everything about her dreams, ideas, experiences and the future she wants.

I need a woman that is loyal and would kick a guy in the balls if he ever touch her.

A woman that can kick ass, that I can trust for good. That is smart and that she wear

sexy outfit when I am around.

A woman only for me.

That's only what I care about in my future love life.